Day 486
My willingness to go down this recovery road through a 12-Step program is unprecedented in my life. It is part desperation and part faith in the recovering lives I've witnessed that gives me the determination to work it. I can think of no more significant exercise of faith since I accepted baptism at seven years old.
That act of faith was real, but it was ingrained in me as a good thing by my parents and my environment and even peer pressure. Recovery is much more holistic; I think it may be more akin to the outward evidence of what spiritual 'salvation' is supposed to be.
Of course, my religious faith is based on the Son of God and the unique role He plays in the 'way to heaven.' However, our churches have a long history of getting people 'saved' then letting them wallow in their brokenness. I don't think that's what God had in mind. I believe the healing and The Promises of the program are a restatement of the Gospel with a practical application. This roadmap can open our hearts to a Higher Power that wants to be in our lives.
To be clear, despite institutional insistences about grace, I am NOT worthy according to the functional rule book as defined by the actions of the church and her members. The 12 Steps are not perfect, either, but neither do they require me to be. Here I am motivated by a daily growth in relationship with God, myself, my family, my friends, and life in general.
I can't help but believe that those are all relationships that the God of Abraham values and wants us to pursue.
–JR
This is gospel for the fallen ones
Locked away in permanent slumber
Assembling their philosophies
From pieces of broken memories
–Brendon Urie, ”This Is Gospel"
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