Day 458
Routine has never been my friend, or at least not a friend I enjoyed. Boredom was my enemy; idleness was my delightful curse.
It seems strange that I avoided the same-ol'/same-ol' because of my distrust of my mind's ability to act-in when a task at hand did not stimulate it, yet it was that need for stimulation that led me to use the spontaneous and the un-routine to act-out. Or not.
Sometimes I pontificate on such things with confidence that it's true, then a random thought passes by and makes me question everything. I don't think I'm alone in that. However, that can lead one to be very much alone.
I am learning how routine — the smallest of intentional tasks — can derail unwanted thoughts and dangerous situations. I still don't like routine, but neither do I like taking depression meds. Yes, there is a similarity. Making the right decision now has more to do with tomorrow than today, which is a little weird since all I have is today.
As long as I choose wisely this hour, I can always decide to be stupid in the next. But allowing the addict in me to have this moment will most likely deprive me of a precious choice tomorrow, and perhaps for the rest of my life.
–JR
You got what it takes you can win
Today is your day to begin
Don't give up here, don't you quit
The moment is now, this is it
–Shania Twain, ”Today is Your Day"
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